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She and her best friend (and secret crush), Christopher, escape their outcast status by immersing themselves in online video games. I mean, I'd been slightly psyched when I'd gotten my topic, because the truth is, I computer games. "So what can be done to keep girls interested in gaming," I went on, desperately, "which studies show increases problem-solving and strategic abilities, and also helps develop social interaction skills and cooperative play? But I think they add a certain to the whole ensemble. At least according to my little sister Frida, who knows about things like that--hair and asked, her blue eyes glittering with indignation, "How is promoting a healthy weight-which scientists have determined as a body mass index of below twenty-four point nine--as beautiful an attack on any woman's self-esteem?

But Emerson's bland world shatters when she attends the opening of a new Stark Megastore and suffers a terrible accident. It's true short-shorts are uncomfortable under jeans and hard to get off in the ladies' room, but they make the twin thigh-holsters in which I hold my high-caliber pistols so easy to get to." The oven timer dinged. If some women are too lazy to go to the gym because they sit around all day , well, that's their problem.

Emerson Watts didn’t even want to go to the new So Ho Stark Megastore grand opening.

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Although it relies on a somewhat far-fetched premise, the text’s abundant references to current pop culture and Em’s witty character keep this read both grounded and fun. YA) Publishers Weekly Cabot (the Princess Diaries series) dishes up all the story ingredients her fans have come to know and love—romance, humor, believable teen dialogue and even a fantastical twist. I knew I wasn't the only one in the room who got a flash of her leopard print thong as she did so. "Here goes nothing," Whitney said, with a laugh, and she unfolded her long, lean frame out from beneath the desk, and sauntered-no, really, even though she was wearing four inch platform heels. If I tried to saunter in four inch heels (even in two inch heels) I'd trip and fall flat on my face-down the aisle to the front of the room, her short, ruffled skirt swaying behind her. "My topic is about why I," Whitney began, in a singsong sweet voice completely unlike the one she uses when she is advising me to bite her, "don't believe in the fallacy that Western civilization's standards for female beauty are too high.You know, that we should take our friendship to a more-than-platonic level. But the truth is, I haven't had a friend since fifth grade. And okay, mostly because I peeked into the box marked as it sat next to the freight elevator, and saw that we liked all the same role-playing games. I guess because we hang out so much, people think we're dating, but nothing could be further from the truth (alas). "And what about yesterday in the cafeteria, when you screamed at Jason Klein to shut up while you were both in line for ketchup for your burgers at the condiment bar? In fact, I'm not sure Christopher has ever even realized that I'm not a boy. The few occasions girls ever actually invited me over in middle school, it was always soawkward. Like, I always wanted to play video games, and they always wanted to play Truth or Dare (with an emphasis on the Truth partlike, "Is it true that you have a crush on that Christopher guy, but that you just tell everyone you're really only friends, and that even he doesn't know you secretly love him? Still, even though we're not dating-however much I might wish that were true--I resented Frida's implication that Christopher isn't cute. How was Em to know that disaster would strike, changing her—and life as she’d known it—forever?

One devastating accident later, and Em Watts, always the tomboy, never the party princess, is no longer herself. Now getting her best friend Christopher to notice that she’s actually a girl is the least of Em’s problems. We're here to critique your profile to help you catch his or her digital eye, teach you how to flirt on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram, master the art of swiping right on Tinder and mobile dating apps, and help you decipher those cryptic text messages.